ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
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OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
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SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
Got this Gem in my email.
Thanks Susan.
Be the change...
Barbara W.
3 comments:
Loved this post. I can't pick a favorite but that dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy is right up there!
p.s. I'm currently listening to Dan Folgerlberg's Disc Two, "Ballads" from his Portrait compilation set. Just had a hankering for DF ever since I read your post last night!
I don't know if you have ever heard his song, The Minstrel but it is one of my favorite DF songs.
I really enjoyed that, thanks for posting it :D
I will check out The Minstrel right now Toccata if I still have itune credits...
:-)
Thaks mellowlee, I used to post a lot more funny emails bnut thses days they are too eleborate with pictures and music... I like simple text jokes.
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